And he called to say goodbye........

August 24, 2007

I was in the middle of a class today when my mobile suddenly started vibrating in my jeans pocket. Mobiles are supposedly "banned" in the college but every dude n' dudette around sport the latest gadgets n show them off to their optimum level. I don't really qualify under 1 of them but yeah...I must admit that I have one too...not really the best in the market but serves the purpose of communication as it had done at that moment...

So who was calling me after all? Who would wanna talk to me? With these questions whirring in my mind, I felt an extreme urge to get my phone out n' look at the caller's name. And that I managed to do with some expertise, in the middle of a boring drone of a lecture!! Did I say I was bored? I no longer was!! I had kangaroos leaping about in my stomach when I saw the name of the person who had called! And the joy apparently showed on my face! I couldn't conceal my excitement at seeing his name on the caller ID...I was unconsciously smiling away to glory! Why else would the lecturer start pelting bits of chalk at me? But the lecturer was just plain lucky today....no amount of her physical abuse would be subject to retaliation from me...I was too happy to waste my time on her! On 2nd thoughts, only she was lucky, I wasn't......the call had ended by then:(

It was just a matter of 5 minutes before my mobile started ringing again. I felt a sudden jolt in the pit of my stomach when I realised that it was him! He still remembered me...still thought of me! It wasn't really goodbye after all...it was just a small rift, wasn't it?...I knew things would be OK...n' I was right, wasn't I? He was calling me!!....trying to get in touch...trying to renew the friendship at where we had left it....

to be continued........

New Beginnings.....

July 14, 2007

A whiff of morning breeze touched my face,
And I woke up in a daze,
Said I,"Today is just another morning, lemme' sleep some more,"
"It's your 1st day of college...wake up," my mom called from the door.

A sudden soar of excitement pricked me like a porcupine,
Oh boy! This was the day I'd been waiting for since a lifetime!
I jumped out of bed n' saw my face in the mirror,
It glowed with excitement as i took a quick shower.

Slipping on some clothes n' looking like a princess,
I strutted off to college for a new life to harness.
"What kind of people will I meet?" was a constant doubt I had,
"Will they accept n' like me for the person I am??"

Thinking thus, I reached the portals of my institution,
Only to find every face around me, drenched in apprehension!!
Some were dressed like desi dolls, some like models of Dior,
But the common thread that bound us all was the intense feeling of fear!

Thinking about my two best friends, I made my way to class,
Looking up at me from their seats, I found, was every lad n lass!
In the first meeting itself I struck up a conversation with some,
Eventually I realised that I was seated amidst conjurors of fun!!!

It's been a week now since that delightful first day,
And these 7 days have taught us to stick together like clay!
Every one of us seems to have a story to tell,
Honestly...I never thought that in such a short time, in my heart they would dwell!!


It's an entirely different story now!!!!!......Guess I'll hafta start all over again!

As we go on.........

May 29, 2007

I’ve passed another ‘stumbling block’ in life. After 2 years of blood & sweat, I've finally successfully completed the stint of junior college. Yeah! I’m supposed to have grown out of the overwhelming excitement of the last benches, giggles at the silliest jokes or just about anything on this planet, the fury & the anger when things went wrong, endless comments among ourselves about the cute guy across the street, the tears of teenage…..In another few months I’ll be a legal adult n those things I mentioned above will be reduced to “childish crap”. But as I look back in retrospection at these 2 years that passed faster than a tornado, I’m compelled to think…..to think of all the good...good? No, great times spent with my friends, of all the moments that brought us closer n closer to each other, of those fiery debates n discussions we had n those comments n catcalls we passed at all those movies(not to forget the tears we shed), of all those times when we laughed our heads off at what someone said or maybe even what someone didn’t say!! Oh! I’ll miss it all so much!!

As I kept thinking I realized 1 thing……..there still are a whole lot of things that have been left unsaid! It probably is too late now….I might never see them again. All of us have set out to fulfill our own dreams n aspirations, ambitions n goals, a path from where there would be no turning back!! No time for each other coz’ we’ll probably have more important people stepping into our lives...new friends,newer ideologies n bigger agendas.There is a 99% probability that we'll prepare a list of possible topics to speak about before picking up that telephone on the desk to actually dial the number of those friends to revive old ties & despite all that effort we might still be unsuccessful at striking up a rational conversation n as a last resort end up talking only about the last movie we watched, books, music, politics n then _________....silence...the 1 thing I dread the most in this world...

I never once thought that an association so close could fall apart so easily!! We shed our emotions n feelings for each other as easily as trees shed in autumn & snakes shed their skin. It pains me!! So before we move too ahead in the race of life...to a place where we cannot even see the baseline....I'd like to tell you folks a big big THANK YOU for all those moments that made life worth living!! It was fun!! It was nice....It was life!!!!!!!

Discovering me.............

Hmm....this one's tough! I'm just another insignificant being in this huge universe with a dream of being famous & making it big someday!! But then since this blog is all about me...my thoughts, my feelings,my opinions......me...me...me....I don't think it's a bad note to start on...a quest to try n know myself better:)

Let's start with the exterior first. On the exterior, I appear to be a tough, emotionally & mentally concrete person, happy with everything around me, but venture a lil' further & you'll find a sensitive heart that's volatile to several little things but probably steeled to the nightmares!!

I hand-pick my friends & am very choosy. Though I may talk to all the people out there...at the end of the day I hold a very few people close to my heart,whom I value more than my life. My family n friends mean the world to me n I can go to any extent to support them. I can be a friend who will stand by you always.....but conditions apply...I usually don't take offence to things, almost never(that explains why people tend to take advantage of me),but when I do....GOD HELP YOU!!!! I can be very mean at times n make life a mighty miserable living hell for you!!!!When I tell you something in confidence, it ought to be locked up in that brain of yours.....I hate it when my personal stuff become headlines.

I'm too much of a cherubic angel I know....but now time for some vices too...

1) I fall prey to flattery very easily:(....I can get carried away faster than the speed of light if you just keep telling me about all my plusses(you may invent some too...I wouldn't mind!)....it's like music to my ears!! I'm like the 3-headed dog for whom flattery is the rhythm of the harp!!

2)I trust people too fast....n I even trust those who I know are out to screw my life & don't deserve to be trusted! I keep giving people ample chances to hurt me...I believe people despite knowing that they're wrong....I'm also kinda suspicious though n just cannot get myself to trust certain people instinctively....even if they move around with a halo on their heads!!

I am a deep thinker n can analyse situations,people,events n the other things in life for eternity....just about anything actually! I love getting to the root of things. In loneliness I find my solace & best amigo....I find me!! I find my greatest companion, confidant & advisor in myself....actually my biggest enemy too.....

I'm myself very confused about myself, so I can't really do too good a job at describing myself!! Mainly because.....Self-discovery is a continuous process....coz' change keeps changing you ever so often!!